My Old Friend
Last post I wrote that we need to test everything we hear beside the Word. (If you missed it, you can read it here)
This is so important for us to do this. So important.
Near the end of last post I admitted to having a wrong attitude, having been friends with this attitude.
Let me tell you what attitude I’m talking about. An attitude of thinking I knew it all. An attitude of judgment towards anyone who didn’t think just like me.
Along with this I hung around with the wrong people, people very full of ideas. This attitude, these people were my friends. ((I still don’t know where they found all their ideas.))
Ideas like:
- You must not wear pants to bed, because what if you have a fire in your house and you have to get out in the middle of the night, someone might see you in pants.
- Don’t feed your children bread, it will rot their teeth.
- Don’t pray in the shower.
- Having money is a sin.
- Owning a house or property is wrong; because then Heaven is not your real home.
And I got caught in this. I was friends with this attitude. I thought I must do these things to get to Heaven and for God to be pleased with me. (This is embarrassing to admit)
I would take all their convictions, ideas and ‘law bondage’ onto myself. And funny thing is, is that everyone, has their own opinion and convictions, and ummm. . . . . I tried to do it all.
Seems silly doesn’t it? It sure does now. Yet wasn’t silly then.
I was filling my head with others personal convictions rather than looking to the Truth. And I was following it. It wasn’t their fault I didn’t know any better; I was never taught to test things by the Word.
It’s like I was talking about last post, things that may be partly true; yet partly false.
I don’t think these people even knew what they were doing to me; they were just sharing the latest and great idea they found. They may have even thought that they were helping; Instead they left me feeling like a failure.
Thankfully throughout a course of time Jesus showed me that I need to test everything by the Word. Every person’s idea, every book I read, every sermon I hear, everything.
So thankfully I can call this attitude “My OLD Friend”
HOWEVER.
I still run into this attitude. I met this attitude in church the other week. One thing after another. She shared one ‘conviction’ of hers after another. Not in the spirit of love but with an air of ‘I’m better than you’. I didn’t ask her for any of those thoughts. I didn’t ask for her opinion on big churches with rock bands. (has she ever been in a big church with a band?) I didn’t ask her what to feed my children to prevent tooth decay. I didn’t ask her what the flower parts that my children need to learn to pass science 3rd grade. I didn’t ask her opinion of giving someone a gift on Sunday.
However I heard it all. She shared that and more with me. I felt like a failure when I walked away. I felt inadequate and very low; certainly much lower than her high standards.
I felt like I had been bombarded. Bombarded with her thoughts. Thoughts that I had to run home and sort through, I had to run home and test it beside the Word.
This made me wonder: Is this how Jesus felt when He ran into the Pharisees and Sadducees?
They questioned Jesus on doing good on the Sabbath day. They questioned Him on what He ate. They questioned Him on picking and eating corn on the Sabbath. They questioned Him on the places He went and the people He ate with. The questioned Him on how he paid taxes. They questioned Him on eating without washing his hands. (Matthew 15:1-3 — Mathew 17:24-26 — Luke 6:1-3 Just to give you a few references)
They thought they knew better than the KING of Kings and Lord of Lords. They tried to point out His faults. They tried to make Jesus look like they wanted him to be. They thought they knew better than Jesus!
I wish I was like Jesus and would have had a reply for each of her ‘thoughts’ that she shared with me.
I wish I would have been ready with a question, to meet her judgements.
I wish I would have, like Jesus, known just what her heart was thinking and meet her comments and suggestions with a story to point her to the Truth.
Yet I didn’t.
I just stood there and listened.
Then went home overwhelmed and broken.
I searched the Scriptures on some of her points and decided not to take any of her thoughts upon myself. I was reaffirmed in some of my convictions.
I was reconnected with my Jesus.
What now? For now, I have begun praying for the next time I meet her in church. I’m praying I can fight this huge desire to look at her life and judge her. I’m praying that I may be filled with LOVE rather than the anger satan wants me to feel. I even feel a little nudge, to go talk to her. To ask her kindly if I can do anything for her, if she needs a friend. Maybe in love, and tell her how her words made me feel. I have more praying to do. More searching to do.
Maybe this whole thing is to teach me a lesson.
A lesson, to guard my tongue.
A lesson, to love more and judge less.
A lesson, to be more like Jesus.
**Ok there. I am done. You may go unsubscribe now. ** See the note in this post if you are confused.
Maybe you can share the scripture with her about why you can’t agree with her rather than how she made you feel. That way she doesn’t judge you on the basis of what you feel but rather she would have to judge you for what scripture says. If I share convictions with someone else it is really awkward if they tell me how lousy I made them feel. I then feel that its all my fault and that they are focused only on emotional aspects. I then am afraid to talk to them. But I do need confronted sometimes, not with everyone else’s emotions, but with Scripture. It canbuild a relationship based on Christ rather than make it emotionally centered.
Im not saying you would do this, but some people make it so much about their emotions, how others made them feel, how dare that person hurt me like that etc, that they come across as really selfish. I used to be a big baby and still am sometimes. I am learning not to center my responses on my emotions but to try to respond based off scripture. If someone rejects me, then i take comfort in knowing that they are rejecting Christ (provided i used the scripture correctly and didnt twist it to fit my conviction).
Been learning about the conscience lately. I would love to recommend the book but i forget the title. I have been learning a lot about the various convictions we hold that are not necessarily Biblical and how to respond when we differ in opinion with other believers.
Anyways, you are not alone in this struggle to respond in love when someone barfs their binding convictions on you!! We all have faced situations like that! I can still remember someone sharing that they cover their head with a pillow at night because God might not hear them if they dont have their head covering on. Another believed its sinful for their children to see them in their pajamas. They tried to always stay as covered up as they would dress during the day. They have very strict convictions on modesty. While i appreciated her deep concern about modesty, I dont think i can wear neck to ankles clothing. I would trip and that would be more revealing than if I wore a little shorter skirt or maybe even pants and didn’t trip haha
I thought this blog was relevant to what I am dealing with too and you are dead right that we need to test everything against scripture!! Good reminder for me and everyone else!!
I thought this blog was relevant to what I am dealing with too and you are dead right that we need to test everything against scripture!! Good reminder for me and everyone else!!